Seeing is believing - Or is it?

The story of Zacharias in Luke 1 is extremely interesting to me. Here we have a man who is sitting in the temple and sees an angel. At first he is afraid, as would be expected when you see a heavenly being. The angel speaks and relays some amazing news.

"Do not be afraid, Zacharias, your petition has been heard, and your wife Elizabeth will bear you a son, and you will give him the name John."

Luke 1:13

As the angel continues to relay the news, I can imagine Zacharias' mouth hanging open as he hears what the angel has to say.

The angel tells him that he will be receiving an answer to his prayers. Zacharias was an older man and one would imagine that he did not recently start praying for a son. It was probably something he had requested over and over again. Additionally, we see later in the chapter that Elizabeth looked at her childlessness as a disgrace - which signifies that this was a long term wish of hers.

So Zacharias has this long term wish, which he hears will be addressed in a miraculous way. His immediate response then was to fall down on his face and praise God, right? NO! Not at all, he immediately responds with:

"How will I know this for certain? For I am an old man and my wife is advanced in years."

Luke 1:18

Zacharias basically says "Hold it just a second there... Prove it to me!" This is an amazing way of answering an angel which he was completely scared of a moment before. He doesn't believe that God will actually do this for him (and lest we think this is not unbelief, take a look at the angel's take on the situation in verse 19).

How on earth could this happen? He had a heavenly messenger standing right in front of him, and he still did not believe. But, we see over and over again that signs can be shown (Numbers 14:11) and miracles upon miracles can be done (Psalm 78:12-16,23-29) but yet people still don't believe (Psalm 78:32). In fact, Jesus even mentions how much of a problem we have with unbelief

"If I told you earthly things and you do not believe, how will you believe if I tell you heavenly things?"

John 3:12

So, I know it's a problem throughout scripture. I need to start looking for it in my life. It's not very hard to find. I have all these things God has provided for me, yet I still don't believe that He loves me and wants the best for me. Now, I wouldn't say that out loud, but I do say it in my heart each time I try to whine and cajole and get what I want. I see all the things that He says will hurt me, but I don't believe He's telling me that for my own good. Again, I wouldn't say that out loud, but I say it with my actions every time I sin.

So, what can I do to help keep my sense of unbelief at bay? My first thought is that it is caused by thinking about things in the wrong order. Zacharias was thinking of all of his problems first (I'm old, my wife is old) and God's power second. And, when I think about it, I do the same thing - "this sin will help me get ... now." I'm thinking of all the things that I need or want, rather than looking at what God is willing and able to provide.

I know in my head that God is willing and able to provide for me. I believe that - but yet I still don't believe that in my heart. Perhaps the best thing for me to do is to follow the prayer of the father of the demon possessed boy and say:

"I do believe; help my unbelief."

Mark 9:24